The Weekend

I had an amazing weekend but one that was full of mixed emotions.  We celebrated MyH(e)art becoming a BERRY, remembered Chad on his birthday, and celebrated Father's Day.  This blog will be filled with elation...don't get me wrong...but I need to say a few things first.

Saturday was Chad's birthday.  It was one of the first things on my mind that day.  I read my daily emails from my family, where everyone was remembering in their own special way.  I was sad.  I knew the day he died that Christmas would be unimaginable without him there.  Thanksgiving for that matter too.  But his birthday?  The day that marked his entry into this world...I didn't think it would hit me the way it did.  I took a pause and really tried to put it on the back burner.  This was MyH(e)art's day...I could be sad tomorrow.  Until I read this.  I was in the truck with Tuck...reading silently on my phone when I had a t-total meltdown.  I know I caught him off guard because he didn't know if he should keep his eyes on the road or on me...the hysterical passenger in the front seat.  Her blog was chilling.  So beautifully and perfectly written.  And then I was really sad.

In that moment I realized that June 19th was Father's Day.  It hit me that this would be the first year of my life to not spend Father's Day with my father...who is alive and well.  So I was sad.  It hit me that his babies were missing their daddy yesterday.  That HIS father spent his first Father's Day without his oldest son.  It broke my heart.

Little moments during the weekend left me paralyzed thinking about him.  At the rehearsal dinner I was upset knowing that he would never meet my future husband.  Knowing he wouldn't be there to give a toast at my rehearsal dinner.  MyH(e)art married a Chad.  Her older cousin Chad had his fourth child that weekend.  He was every where and it was all I could do to not think about him.

Don't get me wrong.  June 18th was a happy day.  I was able to celebrate his life...and one of the most important days in my girl's life.

She said I do.  And he did too.

The weekend was perfect.  After braving some EXTREME weather in Arkansas the Thursday night before...I was in Tupelo and ready for action.  Friday morning started the weekend off with a bang.  A bridesmaid's luncheon filled with lots of laughter, bottomless mimosas, and heaps of chicken salad kicked the day off right.  Lots of meeting and greeting...with the groom's mother and grandmothers in attendance.  I learned that Chad's mother (the MOG) and I are kindred spirits.  She is an absolute hoot, has the best attitude, and will tell it to you like it is- wish I had gotten to meet her sooner.  It was also excellent because so many of my favorite people were all in one place and under one roof.  In typical Tupelo fashion...we took 423409127974523410912 pictures...but I didn't mind.

 Missing 3 bridesmaids and a flower girl...but best group shot I got

 One of my favorite pictures of the weekend

 MyH(e)art with her precious grandmothers

 Original GO

 Original and wannabe newest GO girls

Disney's newest princess.  Watch out nugs...Belle is on her way to Orlando!

Friday afternoon Tuck came to town.  We had a quick visit before I had to get ready to practice my stroll down the aisle.  Please take note of his tie and shirt combos in pictures to follow...my first time shopping for a boy (without any male input)...and I think I did pretty good.  Just as Tuck said, "FYI: I look sexy"....yes, you do sir, yes you do....if I do say so myself.  Dinner that night was fabulous.  The speeches were so sweet and described our couple perfectly. 

After the dinner, Chad's family had us on the rooftop of the restaurant for some dancing.  Let me tell you.  Tupelo girls are known for breaking out into spontaneous song...full on harmonization and everything (don't worry they did it this weekend too).  But Little Rock boys/ Ole Miss KA's?  Definitely known for shaking a tail feather or two.  We had SO MUCH fun dancing that night...it was a GREAT indicator for what Saturday night would have in store. 

 I've done this more post graduation than I ever would have considered doing during college

Saturday could not have gone more smoothly.  MyH(e)art was absolutely breathtaking.  Everything was just perfect.  Her dress was totally her.  From lace in her hair that looked like her everyday headband...side pony included...hit the nail on the head.  The whole day was all her.  Her photographer made everything so easy and allowed her to just soak up the day and HAVE FUN.  I cried as she walked down the aisle.  I could see her tiny little body just shaking as she held on to her daddy.  Being able to see Chad's face during the ceremony was amazing.  He meant every word he said...each vow said with such purpose.  They shared communion together after they said their vows.  She caught my eye as she turned back to be announced as husband and wife.  The look on her face was priceless.  A combination of: this is really happening, I'm definitely almost Mrs. Berry, thanks for being up here with me, and I'm so in love.  She is...so in love.  I'm delighted I got to share in that day with the two of you!

The reception immediately followed.  The wedding party trekked the streets of Tupelo for additional wedding pictures.  It was HOT but gorgeous.  We danced the night away.  I hardly even sweated...I was amazed.  Tuck was dry as a bone when we left...we're lucky that way.

 Apparently I have some stiff competition 

 See, like not hot at all

Best part of the night?  Wedding party did the Wobble.  I hope y'all are able to view this.  We will see.  It was so fun and so very Berry. 

Oh and I toasted the happy couple this year.  Unlike last year.  So they know all my wishes for the future.  With such a solid foundation...so much fun ahead for the two of you!

The Weekend.

Just some words

Just some words to recap my weekend.  No pictures this time...so I totally understand if you feel the need to "X" out.  Go for it.

So I spent the weekend with Tuck.  And with his family.  I had the best time.  He apologized over and over for not having a "plan"for the weekend.  Not having "events" for us to be fully entertained every hour of every day.  It couldn't have been more perfect though.  We both agreed that it was nice to just be.  Since we see each other so infrequently we try to squeeze all this stuff into two days.  We were just together and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

People are always surprised about the weird things that we know about each other but living nearly six hours way from one another...the only thing there is to do is talk.  But this weekend?  I learned a lot.  A lot stuff that made me laugh.

1. The boy has no issue throwing you under a bus.  Say for instance, you aren't particularly fond of eating a certain type of meat...but you will eat it.  Say, too, that this meat (that will remain unnamed) is being served that night for dinner...it's in the plan...his mama planned it...had it cooking.  So hypothetically speaking, say all of that happened, know what he would do?  He would walk into the kitchen and TELL HER THAT YOU WON'T EAT IT.  Ummm, excuse me?  Hypothetically speaking you would apologize profusely, say there was a misunderstanding, tell her that you actually LOVE this meat, and you would eat extra that night.  Hypothetically speaking, of course.
2. When swimming it is important to keep the boy occupied.  Pool toys may or may not have been purchased for his entertainment.  He also may or may not have been the most popular guy amongst his five-year-old counterparts.
3. He hates Oreos.  I don't even think I can go there...because let's be honest...that was almost a deal breaker.
4. When he is eating or drinking something new he gets the most serious look on his face.  I've known for about six months now that we are working with a very limited palate.  BUT this look of fear comes over him...like whatever is inside his oral cavity is about to retaliate on him in there.
5. Sometimes the look of death must be flashed in his direction for the trash to be taken out.  That's all.
6. He's a good sport.  We visited Mimi over the weekend.  Margo (an aunt....you will be hearing about them this summer...Crazy Lady blog in the works) INSISTED we give him a tour of the happenin' town of Belzoni.  We saw all of the highlights...including the cemetery.  Don't think it was a drive by or anything...we had to drive the car through it.  You know, why not?  No trip would be complete without a trip to the cemetery.  He went along with it and didn't break up with me after.  Miracles do happen.
7. Going along with being a good sport...he's suffered through a lot of crazy...but taken it in great stride.  Last week, for whatever reason, my entire family (the women) attacked him on Facebook.  One, who will remain nameless, FORCED him to be her friend...sent some pretty threatening messages.  He does well with cougars...most of these women are in that "cougar" population...so honestly, I think he enjoyed it.
8. It should go on record that THIS weekend we spent the most time together that we've ever spent with each other.  Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday.  Four.whole.days. Thanks for taking off on Monday.
9. Trying to create a drink that you've never actually tasted and don't know the proportions for isn't always the best idea.  It didn't even end up tasting that horrible but you think we could ever make it again?  Heck no.

So those are just some words and some things I learned.

You got to laugh about it.

It has been a year

Well, I've been a blogger for a year and a day.  An eventful year it has been.  So glad I have a lot of it written down.

I have to thank you all for all the sweet messages, cards, thoughts, and prayers that you have been sending our way.  We've felt it.  It is hard to believe it has been three weeks since I lived one of the worst days of my life.  Thank you.  I love you all.

When I got back to the Big City, my sweetie friends swooped me up and took such good care of me.  We had an eventful night the evening that I got back.  $5 buckets?  Yeah.  We met a man...who introduced himself as TyBear (Like the Beanie Baby...his words, not mine).  I love my friends...all of them.

That weekend, the boyfriend came for a visit.  An amazing pick me up.  We did a lot of laughing and eating out. EXACTLY what I needed...minus the calories.  We celebrated a friend's birthday the first night.  Let me tell you, the boy had on his dancing shoes.  I think I've met my match.  The boy also sings VERY loudly.  You think he knows ANY of the correct lyrics?  Heck no...he doesn't.  Does that stop him?  Of course not.  God love him.  We did a brewery tour on Saturday and then spent that night watching movies on the couch.  Can you say perfect evening?

Last weekend, I wound up in Nashvegas for one last rendezvous with one really cute single lady.  Her wedding is the third weekend in June.  I can't believe it.  It was a small reunion for me.  I've made some fabulous friends from weddings alone.  Here's to you MyH(e)art!

 Post cicada attack.  I can't even go there.  Too traumatic to even discuss.

 Be still my heart.  I hadn't seen either of these ladies in six months.

 Fave picture of the whole weekend.  She'll see this after she's married.  That's a microphone in the middle, Mimi.

Boyfriend's bestie.  Sad you weren't there Tuck (boyfriend)? 

So I'm in a two week class right now.  I finish up on Friday.  Hallelujah.  I also leave that day to spend a long weekend with Tuck and his family.  I'm so excited.  I've been told some fishing and other outdoor activities will be going down.  Competition ON. :)  I will be starting work full time next week.  I went for the first time today.  I couldn't ask for a better place to be.  The Lord has blessed me in more ways than I could have imagined since I've been here.  The clinic is so very much my speed.  Three audiologists on staff.  One works mostly with kiddies, one mostly adults, and one mostly cochlear implants.  Two are from the South- one went to UT (That would be Tennessee) and the other...wait for it...OLE MISS.  Both of these ladies go to the Methodist church.  Both are originally from Memphis.  REALLY?  I couldn't be in a more perfect place.  I am looking forward to learning a lot...and working with some sweet babies!!!

Catch you soon. 

How long have you been reading?

Disbelief

I am.  In disbelief.  My cousin died on Tuesday.  My first cousin.  My oldest first cousin. Unexpectedly.  I found out Tuesday morning right before some various appointments.  I cancelled, obviously.  I had a final the next day, so immediately following my pang of sadness I went to study.  And I studied all day.  Wednesday, I took my final and then drove nearly eight hours to be with my family.  I would have driven off the map to be with them, but my point is...I didn't have time to think about what had just happened...and honestly I wouldn't let myself go there.

I'm not writing this for anyone else but myself.  I haven't had words and I still really don't have words.  What do you say?  What can you say?

I know I'll never forget him.  He was a constant reminder today on my drive home.  You see, he was a farmer...and I was in the Mississippi Delta.  With every John Deere tractor that passed me today I could see his suntanned skin...it was the color of a Cherokee Indian...from hours out in the sun...bright red cheeks and neck.  I know I will always think of him when I enter the flat lands of the Delta, where the sky hits the ground, and you cruise by the perfect rows of crops on either side of Highway 7.  I could see him out there today.

As soon as I heard the news I needed to be with my family.  There is no place else I wanted to be.  My family is fiercely close.  The bond is undeniable.  I had to be there.  Some of us are obviously more emotional than others, some are move love-y than others...but these last few days?  We hugged tighter, lingered longer, and loved deeper.  He was there and I could feel him.

He was always there.  On Saturday mornings when we would come for a random visit...he would stop by.  Holidays.  Always.  If he had walked in on any given night in the past few days...I wouldn't have been surprised at all.  Not in the least.  He is the one we would have leaned on.  Believe that this happened?  I can't.

I will always remember his dimpled chin.  His funny walk sometimes...with one leg partially locked.  The way he would duck his head when he walked in Mimi's backdoor.  His servant spirit, generosity, and humble heart.  I will NEVER forget the sound of his roaring laugh when something was really funny or the way he would cut his eyes when something was really awkward.  I can remember getting a running start into his arms when I was just a little girl.  All of our memories will keep us going.  Stories told this weekend will always make me laugh.  Stories told by his daddy and wife...the kind specifically about you and him...where the story teller isn't crying so you can't either.  The kind that you remember too, that you will never forget, but the kind that you didn't know meant something to him too.  Those stories that made you sob later on when no one could see you.

I'm not mad or confused right now.  I haven't even asked, "Why?".  Believe me, I could.  This situation could bring about all of those emotions...plus so many more.  Right now I'm just numb.  I'm still just in disbelief.  I witnessed the funeral, yet it is still unfathomable to me.

He was Chad.  My Chad.  Our Chad.

To say "was" and "Chad" in the same sentence is unimaginable.  But it happened.  And I'm sitting here still stunned.

Truly in disbelief but feeling so much love.

Overload

Prepare yourself.  I've been gone for a while and a lot has been going on.  We are halfway done with finals...only two left and I wish I could describe to you how happy I will be to be done with them...and the semester in general because it has just been dragging on.

So since you last heard from me I went home for Easter, boyfriend came for visit #2, we celebrated the Royal wedding, and have just been having a lot of fun.

Easter weekend I sped out of the Big City to get back home.  Boyfriend came for the weekend.  We hadn't seen each other in about three weeks and I hadn't seen my family in about six or seven...so I was READY to get there.  Friday night was just perfect.  The weather was great (anything would be better than what it has been like in the Big City lately) so my parents fired up the grill.  We sat outside the whole night- cooking, eating, and visiting.  I mentioned before that I hadn't been home in like six weeks...and our dinner that night was catered to the boyfriend...naturally, that's just how Boosin is...I'm not bitter or anything.  Saturday we just ran errands and visited with everyone.  My sweet boyfriend had a special night planned for us.  He took me on a surprise date that he planned on his own.  We got all dressed up and looking good for our night out on the town.  When we got in the car I was presented with a small box...wrapped so perfectly.  I was shocked and just kept saying, "What IS this?!".  I opened it up and inside was the prettiest bracelet.  I was like...this is EASTER...you don't give gifts like this on Easter.  He didn't care...he said that he loves the way I look when I'm surprised...so that's why he did it.  I've worn it every day since.  We had a FABULOUS meal at Folks Folly.  We ate SO MUCH and just had the best time talking.  Sunday morning the Easter bunny came...so did the boyfriend bunny.  I came back to the Big City with a small candy store...and other goodies.  So loved I tell you.

 The pearl beauty there.  He did so good.  And no help this time... :)

The weekend after Easter, Boyfriend returned to the Big City.  We have never seen each other on back to back weekends.  So exciting.  We did a whole lot of nothing that weekend...and it was perfect.  Just a lot of together time.  We did go downtown to look at the river and see the Arch.  Lazy was exactly what I needed before finals week.

That red thing down there is a stop sign.  The road running along side the river is completely under. 

That same Friday we hosted a Royal Wedding party.  Of course we got up at 3:30 to watch.  I think we would have slept longer but OUR TEACHER showed up.  We invited her the day before (she's in her 30's and we love her) but never imagined she would really come...especially not at 3:30 in the morning.  But she did.  So we had a palate party in our living room and watched as guests arrived and she walked down the aisle.  The thing I was thinking about the most that day was Kate's dad.  I remember joking as a child with my parents that I would one day marry a prince...really THE prince...like Wills or Harry.  Kate Middelton ACTUALLY did that.  Like her dad walked her down the aisle to an actual....living, breathing...prince.  Like she will be a Queen.

Huge mimosas at 4:30 AM...totally. 

Weaklings.  Couldn't hang.  Asleep during the ceremony. 

Wednesday night I went to a book signing.  I've never been to a signing before but I had to go to this one.  I've been following Matt Logelin for quite a while now.  His blog is great but his story is tragic.  His wife died after giving birth to their child.  He starting blogging about his grief and to keep a running record of his precious daughter.  In his grief he created a widow/widower foundation for others and their loss.  His mission now is for his daughter to know her mother.  He travels with her to places that he visited with his wife...so that she can experience things her mother experienced.  His book came out in April and its about his loss and learning to cope.  He is just so real and writes how he feels.  You just hang on every word.  "Two Kisses for Maddy"...do yourself a favor and read it. 

He's right, but he wrote that because I told him that she surprised me by pre-ordering it.

And then just having fun and celebrating being half way done with finals.

 Yesterday.  Three deep in my bed after our second final of the week.  Just finished a nap, pigging out on candy, and watching Sex and the City.  Doesn't get much better than that.

 Gorgeous Berns.  I want your eyes.

A little Walter Anderson birthday action.  I brought it back at Easter.  Hung it today, by myself.  Used a tape measure and everything.  Boom, Boosin. 

So there.  A major catch up.  Lots of fun trips coming up.  MyH(e)art's bachelorette party, her wedding, a visit to G-Town...just to name a few.  

Hopefully I'll be better about posting.