Portland

There have always been a few a few things that I never thought  I would compromise on.

A couple of those being:

Thanks, here's credit  Oh and here too

Yes.  Toothpaste and toilet paper.

Yes, possibly neurotic.  But no, no compromise here.  Had to be these brands...and preferably a double roll...if I'm being honest.  But as I entered the world of grad school I had to make some compromises.  While I clung to these brands until around midterm, I found that I could survive without my extra-whitening toothpaste and...well toilet paper is toilet paper...still has to be a double roll and three-ply but I've found a way to get by.

All this "compromising" has made me realize there are still things in life that I won't compromise on.  One of those being: Portland.

Portland.  It has kind of become my metaphor, if you will, for love.  Like "the one" (If you believe in such a thing).

See a few years back I was in a serious relationship.  This was pre grad school application process, but at the time I was looking in to schools that would be in close proximity to him.  We had discussed different scenarios about where we would be in the next few years (let's say five) and at the time, he felt he was being led to Oregon...Portland to be exact.

I can still vividly remember that conversation.  We were riding around one night...in the rain...when he dropped that bomb on me.  I kind of laughed it off at first, but when he asked if I would come with him I knew he was being completely serious about it.  All I said was...no.  At that moment I really had no clue the impact that the conversation, but especially the answer, would have on my life.

A few weeks later I was with my family for Easter.  After dinner my uncle came into the kitchen to chat with me.  I think he wanted to catch up on what had been going on in my life...but I think we were solving world problems that night.  As we sat at the kitchen table we literally flipped a coin to see if I would go to graduate school for Speech Pathology or Audiology.  Best two out of three and the rest is history.  But then.  Yeah then we started talking about the boy and relationships.  I told him things were serious and we had been together a long time, so naturally I was looking at schools close to him.  We talked about Portland and I'll never forget what he said: "Nothing good happens in Portland.  It always rains, but the problem is in your answer.  If this was it, you would go".

Thinking about it still takes my breath away.  It was one of those sky-opens-up-heavenly-host-of-angels-singing-a-heavenly-chorus-bright-light kind of moments.  It really was.  I would go...if it was right.

I kid you not.  A little over two weeks after the "enlightenment" conversation...the relationship ended.  And after four long years, it was just over.

I doubt my uncle knows that I've held on to this little "metaphor" for so long.  I know he didn't intend on it having some "great meaning" in my life, but it really did.  Since then, I know what I'm looking for when it comes to relationships.  I know that when it come down to it...I'll want to go too....I'll have to go too.  Even if it is Portland...where nothing good happens and it only rains.

One day I will...


End up in Portland.