Need I Mention

I'm not watching the news anymore.  I literally refuse to turn it on.

Last week I was informed that the Big City= Most Dangerous City.

Thanks Perez

Need I say more?  We all know that I am terrified of my own shadow, that I lock up my home-home with every dead-bolt possible (we live in suburbia), that when alone I immediately lock my car door upon my rear hitting the seat, and for that matter...I walk with keys clutched in my hand ready to stab someone's eye out...henceforth and there shall...don't sneak up on me.  So need I mention there were EIGHT murders in the Big City today.  Four of them in a funeral home...during a funeral. Umm, hellero? 

I was bombarded with visceral attacks from the media today.  I was stuck in the cafeteria this afternoon with CNN blaring.  The way they described it, 1) Korea might actually already be off the face of the planet...if not they will indefinitely be attacking the US, 2) I will undoubtably be manhandled at any and all airports, 3) These Wiki-leaks have made the US the Wicked Witch of the West (literally)/ terrorist spies, 4) They even reported the funeral murder here...so I will face an untimely death by stepping out of my home.  I'm not getting Fox News Tweets anymore either.

From now on, my news sources will be Entertainment Tonight, Star Magazine, US Weekly, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, Conan, Jersey Shore, and Chelsea Handler.  They report on the important stuff, right?  Who cheated on who, Prince William's wedding, how to get my GTL on, vodka, and botox.  What more could I ever want to know?

Need I mention I'm being extremely sarcastic in this rant? 

But for real.  I'm done with the news.